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Yes, you can survive the holidays without your spouse

Breaking up, or getting a divorce, when the holidays are coming is devastating. How can you spend time with your family or friends when you won't have your spouse or significant other with you? What do you say, and how should you act? Should you be trying to deal with the holidays and divorce negotiations at the same time?

These are all good questions and things you should think about, but the truth is that surviving the holidays starts with taking care of yourself. It's okay to put your divorce on hold for a few weeks while you get through Christmas and New Year's celebrations. If you can do that, then all you need to focus on is the holidays.

The holidays can be difficult for some when their partners aren't involved, but coping starts with making a plan. If you feel uncomfortable seeing your soon-to-be ex's family, don't try to. You aren't obligated, and you should take care of yourself. You may want to consider talking to your family and friends, though, as they could offer words of support or a helping hand in times to come.

If you have mutual friends with your ex, it's okay to spend time together. Your friends may feel awkward, but it's okay to have them around. If you would rather not because of the shared relationship you have, then don't and take a break.

Plan an escape for anything you do, too. If you have to meet up with friends and don't think you'll feel up to it, it's okay to make an excuse or simply to tell them you're not feeling up to going out or going to a party. Those who care about you will understand that you're going through a difficult situation and should be supportive of your wishes.

Source: LifeHacker, "How to Survive a Breakup During the Holidays," Eric Ravenscraft, Dec. 06, 2016

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